New Year, New Resolutions

And so another new year has begun. If you are anything like me I am always inspired to start anew, refresh, recharge. Unfortunately it isn't as easy as that. In the past I have always made lofty, highly unachievable resolutions: lose 70 lbs by February, get rid of all clutter in home, move to a new home next week.

Ok, so maybe those were slightly exaggerated, but truthfully each year I make my list and usually within days I have "fallen off" the proverbial wagon and I my resolutions are a thing of the past. I have been reflecting a lot the past week or so and I realize that what I want more than anything is to be the person I was used to be. Not literally, 10 years all but erases that possibility. But I want to look in the mirror and see someone smiling back that not only do I like, but funny as this may sound, I love.

Posted below is my list of resolutions for the year. You might note that #4 on my list is Love myself. This isn't anything weird or funny, just truly loving who I am. I need to appreciate all of the good in my life. Be thankful for what I have and what I can do. And more importantly I need to accept what I can't do, not beat myself up over it, but accept that its ok.

In 2 weeks I will be turning 35. That is a magical age to me, not because I am half way to 40 but because I feel like I am finally an adult. An adult who resolves to love myself.

"To Thine Own Self Be True"

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell, my blessing season this in thee!
~Shakespeare

The always amazing Kelle Hampton has a great post featuring these beautiful and wise words from Shakespeare. What seems like such a simple and easy concept is one of the most difficult for most people.

Why does it always seem we want to be someone we are not. Its the classic "keeping up with the Jones" that most people face on some level. But as I approach my 35th birthday I question myself - why am I not good enough just the way I am.

Being the mother of a daughter I worry that I will impart my insecurities upon her. I don't want her to feel that her life if ruined without the "right jeans" or the "cool watch." But I have to question how I can instill in her a sense of self worth and pride when I still don't have that myself.

Earlier this year I made a conscious effort at eliminating so called "toxic people" from my life. I decided that if people didn't like me and want to be friends with my for who I am, why should I try to be their friend. I have long felt like that 5th grader I once was, few friends, trying to be cool, peering in at the group from the outside. I felt like I was compromising who I was as a person and more importantly as a parent to be their friend. While my datebook may not be filled up with play-dates and outings, I also no longer have that crushed ego when they don't call, or cancel at the last minute or in general dismiss me.

Its also not a secret that my weight has been a constant battle for me. One I have been fighting for over 20 years. I am weary of the fight, and feel that to a certain degree the weight I carry is the heaviness in my heart. The lack of self-esteem weighing on me, bringing me down.

I am good enough.
I am smart.
I am creative.
I am funny.
I am a good teacher.
I am good at applying makeup.
I am a great parent.
I am a good wife.

The question begs to be asked, why is was it so hard for me to write those things about myself? They are true, but why is the truth so hard to face?

I must be true to myself, starting today.

Hello, Anyone there?

I don't know why I am making this out to be harder than it really is... Writing a blog is about sharing your slice of life with the "world." But for some reason as much as I intend to "share my life" I never get around to it. Not only do I read multiple blogs each day, I have several bloggers that I consider to be my "friends." However for me, typing the words doesn't flow naturally.

Now that I most certainly have offended anyone who might read this blog with my overuse of quotation marks, I will begin once again.

Blogging is such an easy and compelling way to keep track of life, kids, and everything else that might be thrown at you. I keep stating that my intention is to write everyday. Ok, maybe probably won't happen. But I pledge to update at least 3 times a week...

Now that I've posted my intention, some pictures, which always make life better!

The Start of Summer

Summer has come in like a lion, blasting us with its hot, sultry air. And is there any taste better than a melting popsicle on a hot summer day?

End of the School Year

To celebrate the end of a sucessful school year, Will, Kate and I headed to the mall for some Auntie Anne's pretzel sticks, and some fruity delish smoothies from Smoothie King. All I have to say is YUM!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Rainy Days, Stay Awhile

The past few days the rain has been coming down by the bucketful. In fact it has been raining so much I was beginning to wonder if I should look in to building an ark. But although the rain keeps us inside, I don't mind too much. Its nice to have change of pace and we had a lot of very important things to do such as:

Such as take care of "Abby" in her fairy home.


We also had to build many buildings out of Lego's.


To top off our extremely busy afternoon we had an entire fleet of airplanes and cars to park in the garage.


In all it was a thoroughly exhausting day!

Mother's Day

When describing Mother's Day 2010 words escape me. Perfect and wonderful don't begin to describe the day. the munchkins thankfully slept in, which in turn allowed me to sleep in as well. That in and of it self is a blessing. The rest of the day was very relaxed and laid back, save for one very exciting moment: my PRESENT! I by far believe that my husband is the best of the best. Several weeks ago in passing I mentioned that I would like a DLSR camera. Nothing to fancy, but one that would take good pictures of the kids. Oh my goodness, he went crazy. Not only did her purchase an amazing Canon, but he bought the top of the line, really nice one, with 2 lenses... Hello??? Two lenses!!!

Needless to say the remainder of the day consisted of me taking pictures of the kids, our home, and any other animate or inanimate object I came across. I am in complete and total love, and while I do still need to work out some kinks, the present is perfect.

And not only is the present perfect, so was my day.